Learned Limb

Oh, Papa!

I was excited that it was the begining of the next phase of Crusade when our Pope let loose on the Mohammedian heretics, even if his actions were only rhetorical and not properly martial. I was severely disappointed by the Pope's back-pedaling and apologies for his comments regarding The Heretic Mohammed, and his subsequent kow-towing to the 'Prophet's' damned, misguided followers.

What I still do not understand is why he was quoting the nancy-boy Manuel II Palaiologos in the first place.

The man was a pipsqueak, superintending the long decline of the Byzantine Empire in the face of an agressive expansion by the Caliphate of the Mohammedian heretics. I'm not surprised that such a girlish man should favor reason and dialogue - the toolkit of the homosexual. I have no argument or criticism of Mohammed spreading his heresy by the sword. All I rue is the inability of pip-squeaks like Palaiologos to resist that manly expansion with the strength of their own ropey-veined arms.

It seems to me that even the Mohammedian heretics have become pitifully feminized to react like pewling babies when the Pope points out the only manly and laudible aspect of the 'Prophet's' character. Indeed, they should celebrate and thank for Pope for praising the manly blood-lustiness of The Heretic. I think the Pope is actually jealous. I bet he'd love to act like a proper Tool of Our Lord on earth, and rend the unfaithful with the same Lordly fury that brought The Heretic and his descendants control of half the known world, and has since guided billions of souls into Hell for Old Thorny. Instead, the Pope is forced to mince around dressed like a woman, kissing babies, and sucking the cocks of heretics. How has His Church fallen so low?

Our Holy Leader Bush should take up the mantle of Church leadership that is his by Divine Right of Might, bringing the Holy See to America where the Faithful can muster and continue the Holy Crusade against the tantrum-throwing cresent-lickers who follow the Mohammedian heresy. Religious leadership flows from the God given strength to subject others to His Will, not some elaborate secret homosexual daisy-chaining and pot-smoking ritual by phallus-headed Cardinals.

This latest episode just shows how desperately Christianity needs renewal through the healthy and natural heterosexual practice of welding political, military, and religious might into the person of an unresistable Holy Leader. Ironically, it is exactly such a Fuherprinzip which the Pope mistakenly criticized, no doubt because he wished to deride the manly virtues the Holy See no longer possesses.

Mohammed got everything right, except his theology.

My manservant informs me that the fireplace is stoked with hot coals. I must stick my head in for my monthly barbering. The Bible tells us that it is UnGodly for a man to cut his hair with metal, thus I obey His Will and singe it off. It's the right thing to do.

The Excruciation of Our Enemy

The nancy-boy homosexual lobby is bemoaning the triumph of Holy Torture over capitulation to the Mohammedian Heresy, of course. But our Holy Leader's victory needs be put in context. The Geneva Conventions which the defeatist bum-lovers keep moaning about isn't even 80 years old. It is a recent wrinkle in the Law of Nations, and nothing to the eternal verities of Holy Law. Saving souls through excruciation is a practice supported by laws of Nature, God, and the Holy Apostolic Church. No secularist claptrap can stay the hand of Justice.

The simple fact is that excruciation is a vital tool in our Crusade and our Parliament is right to ensure that tool is not compromised by namby pamby adherance to new-fangled 'Treaties' purporting to limit the rights of the Faithful to Crusade in Peace. Far from the dire predictions of the phallus-lickers, the world will not depise us for taking up the ancient tools of Inquisition; they will fear and respect our resolve and devotion to His Will.

I can't wait for my Brothers on the High Court to either refuse to grant Cert on any case arising under this Holy Act, or to confirm its consistency with our Holy Constitution. How can crusading in His Holy Name, being consistent with the Law of our Lord, be inconsistent with the Laws of Man? Even should some pissant jurist try to declare the two incompatible, I have no fear that our Holy Leader will simply take appropriate emergency measures, declare him or her an Enemy Combatant, and have the errant jurist excruciated until they recant their heresy.

Now, I must away and oil my Iron Maiden and replace the chains on my Rack. I'm going to be very busy doling the Holy Justice soon. Bless our Holy Leader for his Wisdom and Foritude. My sinewy manly parts are twitching in anticipation.

Confirm Judge Haynes, Dagnabbit!

A worthy and Godly man is being assassinated by the charcter snipers of the homosexual left. William James Haynes II has served our nation with ability and Lordly rectitude all his life. Most recently he served as General Council for the Defense (of the Faith) Department under the Messiah Bush. He was nominated to sit on the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Fourth Circuit in 2003, and has been held up by atheistic homosexuals in the Senate ever since.

Haynes promulgated the enlightened policies that allowed the excruiciation of the Mohammedian heretics in our present Holy War. Under his leadership, our armed forces were freed of the nancy-boy restrictions imposed upon them by intenationalist belly-lint worshipers under the Conventions named after that apostate city, Geneva.

800 years from now, Haynes' name will shine forth in history with the same zeal as that of the immortal Judge Tomas de Tourquemada! It is only fitting that we elevate him to the court of appeals, and thence to the Supreme Court, so that he may promulgate his vision of our government turned into a weapon of the Godly for use against the godless across the entire globe.

I call upon all Senators who have ears to hear the Good Word of our annointed leader, George W. Bush, to encourage your brothers to do His will and confirm this servant of God. I further call upon those Senators to rend and destroy the heretic homosexual baby-killing collectivist femi-nazi Senators who oppose the rightful ascention of Judge Haynes.

The Bible commands us in 2 Chronicles 15:13 "All who would not seek the LORD, the God of Israel, were to be put to death, whether small or great, man or woman." By their own act of defying the will of God, that Haynes be elevated to the Judgehood, all Senators in opposition expose themselves to the Righteous Judgment of we the Chosen.

I've got to go excruiciate a few cats now. I am studying for a medical degree so that I might better understand the urgent need for relieving physicians from liability for negligent harm to their patients. I do so enjoy the process of extracting the hearts from their little still-living chests. And the cat blood comes in very handy for keeping the Liche of the immortal Rhenquist at bay. He's a delightful dinner companion, so long as one can assure that one will not be on the menu.

Special Needs of the Mohammedian Heresy

The U.S. Court of Appeals for the 2nd Circuit (the alma mater of the great Learned Hand!) made a great and Godly decision recently. They reviewed a bold and manly program to conduct random and suspicionless searches of commuters wishing to ride the series of subterranian tubes beneath New York City. The abscence of any specific terror threat, and the abscence of any evidence that such searches deter terrorists, did not stop the court from making the right decision: they found that totally unwarranted and intrusive searches of random citizens does not offend that Johnny-come-lately Amendment IV of the Holy Constitution.

The court relied on the so-called 'special needs' doctrine. Ordinarily, a warrantless and suspicionless search is presumptively unreasonable, and thus unconstitutional. But the special needs doctrine holds that a suspicionless checkpoint search system may be lawful if, as a threshold matter, it can be shown that the program has as its immediate purpose an objective distinct from evidence gathering asociated with criminal investigation. Given such a condition, the court may then weigh the competing considerations, including:

• the weight and immediacy of the government interest in conducting the searches,
• the nature of the privacy interest at stake and the character of the intrusion,
• the efficacy of the program in advancing the government interest.

The court found that the because the officers only search for explosives and citizens may refuse to be search (though they cannot then enter the subterranian tubes), that the character of the program was that of a special need, not law enforcement. They further found the government's interest to outweigh those of tube travelers.

This is wise policy and should be seriously considered for application to our system of aeroplane stations. Recently a FOX News orator made the manly suggestion that a separate system of searches be instituted for the use of the Mohammedian heretics. I believe this may be just such a special needs exception as the court used in this case of the subterranian tubes of New York. Obviously, the purpose of separating out the heretics and subjecting them to special scutiny is not normal law enforcement investigation. Clearly, the purpose is to put the heretics on notice that they are not wanted in America and must not attempt to fly upon our aeroplanes lest they be subject to searches of their privy cavities. This plainly fits within the special needs doctrine.

Given that we will only search for anything that is not actually a part of the heretics body that could conceivably be used as a weapon, incendiary, explosive, or any sort of tool or contrivance, and that the heretics can refuse a search by avoiding an area within roughly 50 miles of an aeroplane station, the Second Circuit's reasoning is plainly four-square with the proposed Mohammedian aeroplane station queue program.

My manly juices are swelling at the possibilities this line of reasoning opens. We could could have a special needs search of liberal nancy-boys and girls at polling places to ensure the safety and traquility of proper God-loving citizens whilst casting their holy votes. All the liberal faggotry-lovers need do to avoid a good rogering with a constable's nightstick is avoid the polls on election day. Yes, the Second Circuit's decision is obviously the result of Divine inspiration and Lordly reason.

I must now attend to my horse. My manservant informs me that the coating of lard is complete, and she is ready for mounting. I must not keep the neighborhood urchins waiting: they do so love to watch the thews of my thighs contract as I ride the mare, lathered in sweat and grease, to the finish line

Stamping out Heathen Heresy

The Federal 9th Circuit Court is considering a case with far-reaching religious import. While I understand that the Court sits in that cess-pool of faggotry, San Francisco of the California Territory, it should none-the-less make a Godly decision.

The controversy is that the Heathen Tribes of the Arizona Territory are angered that a group of mountains they naively worship (ironically named the San Francisco peaks) will be defiled by a faddish nordic 'ski' resort located therein making artifical snow out of reclaimed waste water. The Heathens feel this practice is insufficiently respectful to their mountain sprites.

Hopi attorney Scott Canty said "the Hopi have revered this place, this mountain, for more than 1,000 years, where the Hopi have built their entire culture." How sad and deluded to base one's entire culture upon a sad little susperstition. How I yearn to bring these poor people the Good News of Our Lord!

Jack Trope, a Hualapai attorney, said the man-made snow also could melt into a nearby spring the tribe uses for healing ceremonies. Once it touches the spring, he said, using those waters is akin to "committing spiritual malpractice." Can you imagine the Heathens actually believe that some waters are blessed and can be befouled by "spiritual malpractice?" How sad. Obviously, if they were proper Christians, they would understand that a Priest ordained by God can bless and make holy even the meanest ditchwater.

The correct and manly judgment seems obvious: not only should the court allow the ski resort to spray sewage on the Heathens' mountains, they should mandate it. The sooner this Heathen mountain cult is stamped out, the better. Forebearance of these Primitives' cultic superstitions only encourages them to deny their Rightful Lord and Master. The Court must certainly compell mucturation on these mountains to save the Heathens' souls. Any other decision denies the essentially Christian character of the American Nation and provides sanction to the bizzare cultic beliefs of a beknighted and ignorant race.

A mountain being holy - what poppycock. Only a Mount from which a Holy Prophet ascends may be sactified as Holy; even the Jews and the Mohammedian heretics understand that.

Now, if you will excuse me, I must make my rounds to service the wombs of my wives. A man's manly duties are never done; so it's a good thing I have pre-oiled by thewey limb.

Brother Rhenquist Becomes Immortal

My good friend William Rehnquist always did have excellent timing. He got himself appointed to the bench by being the right bastard at the right time for Nixon. Got himself elevated to Chief Justice by Reagan for the same reason. Now Rhenquist has gotten his dearest wish and become immoral using the necromantic powers of the thousands of deaths in the Katrina disaster.

He had been hanging in there like a dog with his last bone since the thyroid cancer hit him, waiting for an event that might provide enough sudden death to allow him to moult off his mortal coil and become eternal. Offensives in Iraq and Afghanistan weren't cutting it; too distant. I thought Rehny would have to get cryogenic and wait for the next scheduled Al Qaeda attack, but he either got lucky or called in a major favor to get that storm so close to the General Jackson's towne.

With all that death energy floating free, Rehny is flying high. He won't have to worry about recharging his battery for a few hundered years. Of course, he can't continue as Chief Justice, the people can't forced to countenance an openly Liche lawyer on the highest court - yet. But he will work quietly behind the scenes. I hear he's accepted an offer from the Skull and Bones firm (they groom all the top undead conservative jurists, now).

I have to go place the ritual marks on my body with cat's blood, lest Rehny shows up here feeling peckish. I suggest you do the same...

Supreme Court Deface the Decalogue

In the annals of the Supreme Court of the United States the decisions upon the public display of the Decalogue, McCreary and Van Orden, will stand testament to the perfidy of modernist jurisprudence. There were a few rare glimmerings of properly godly jurisprudence in the opinions, but the Truth did not carry the day.

Brother Thomas came nearest the Truth, as he often does, but stopped short of the mark. Bother Thomas divined that the 14th Amendment’s nasty habit of incorporating other civil rights so as to make them incumbent on the states does not reach the religious clauses of the First Amendment; the First is simply too thewy to be manhandled so by the puny and pusillanimous 14th. In Brother Thomas’ view, a state, save for any provisions they might wish to place in their own constitutions, should be free to establish and promote religion as their respective Houses of Burgesses feel proper. Surely this is the right conclusion of Law in accord with His Holy Will. States should be free to set forth laws enforcing Holy Commands, not just display them futilely in a park or public building. Without the teeth of actual punitive Law behind those displayed Commandments, it will degrade the public morals to have His Word displayed with governmental approval without the sanction of the criminal justice system standing behind them. Clearly, states should be free not only to display the Words of God, but to enforce them as well.

In the states, whatever sect is strong enough to claim control of the government surely deserves the ability to lay low its rivals with the power of the state, as Brother Thomas would provide. Clearly, each state was intended by the Founders to be a society of Faith with the power to exclude those of other faiths, for their own good. As long as a religion is Christian, any sectarian cleansing in pursuit of proper purity only brings greater glory to His Name.

‘Judge’ Souter also touched upon some Right Reason, though he is normally a godless wussy-boy, when he quoted the great Justice Brother Story who said the purpose of the Establishment Clause “was not to countenance, much less to advance, Mahometanism, or
Judaism, or infidelity, by prostrating Christianity; but to exclude all rivalry among Christian sects.” Surely this insight is key. The framers intent when they sought to limit government patronage of ‘religion’ was to prevent patronage to various sects of the only ‘religion’ of the Founders, Christianity. This nation was conceived as a nation of Christians, and thus any proper originalist understanding of the Clause is that the federal government, while restricted from choosing sides in the squabbles of established Christian sects, is perfectly free to discourage, even outlaw non-Christian beliefs, or post-Foundational Christian heresies, such as the Jahovah’s Witnesses and Mormonism.

Surely, any interpretation which protects the Mohammedian or other heresies, animalistic many-godded goobledygook, or Godless atheism from a healthful and wise pogrom to rid the body politic of such infections falls too far from the intended meaning of the Constitution. These Decalogue cases demonstrate that even the most ‘conservative’ of ‘judges’ have their noses too far up the Devil’s ass to deserve the title of the office they inhabit. Not only should the Ten Commandments be posted prominently in every public space, but the government should have the power to compel adherence and belief in those Laws, and cause them to be published and obeyed in every corner of the land, including your house if you don’t have a Bible (you Godless thug).

Now I have to go rub my body with fragrant oils for the adoration of my fans and well-wishers whilst I stand before my picture window that looks out upon the orphanage’s playground.

Sacred Purification of the Flesh

I am amazed and chagrined by the increasing kerfluffle about torture of prisoners of war. I mean, really, what else are they good for? It's not as if torture isn't sanctioned by the Lord Almighty. Revelations 9:5 says, "And to them it was given that they should not kill them, but that they should be tormented five months; and their torment was as the torment of a scorpion, when he striketh a man.” I'm not sure if the Lord wants us only to torture people for 5 months; I think rather that he's just saying those particular torture beneficiaries would only be able to resist the truth for 5 months, and thus that only 5 months was neccessary.

Beyond the text of the Good Book we have numerous examples of the righteous and proper use of torture against the enemies of God. The Holy Roman Apostolic Church knew how to get the job done when it formed the Holy Inquisitions to stamp out heresies of all forms. Should our American President, as the head of our holy nation under God, do less while striving to stamp out the Mohammedian heresy? The glorious names of great men of the harrow and brand, like the great judge Tomas de Torquemada, echo down throught the ages with tales of their mighty and heroic deeds in the name of the pure faith. Torquemada! Now there was a jurist after my own sinewy and vascularly stout heart!

Why this modern condemnation of torture by the MSM? Simple. Those who oppose torturing prisoners in the war on terror are terrorist sympathizers, and may as well be terrorists themselves. We should torture them and find out. They want us to fail in our holy mission to stamp out the Mohemmedian heresy. They want to leave us helpless and mewling like liberals before our vile enemies. They want the world to scorn us and vilify us a weak little girls, without the will and determination to protect ourselves from the scum of this world.

They will argue that some of those who are tortured know nothing, or are innocent of any crime: on the contrary, they are all conspirators in the spread of the Mohammedian heresy and must be purified of their sin against the One True Faith. So you see, even if we do not develop actionable intelligence, we are still bringing souls back to God. And that is enough reason to torture them.

Now, I have an appointmet to have my massive and pendulous scrotum exfoliated with silicon carbide sandpaper while I ponder the great jurisprudential feats of Fra Torquemada.

Dr. James Dobson, Undercover Nancy-Boy

James C. Dobson, Ph.D., suspiciously over-educated agent provocateur (argh... the wimpy tongue, it burns!) of the homosexual left, hailed today the confirmations of Priscilla Owen, Janice Rogers Brown, Richard Griffin and David McKeague, saying "We call on the members of the Senate to put a permanent end to judicial filibusters and bring all of the president's nominees to the Senate floor for up-or-down votes. Only by doing so will they provide 'advice and consent' as prescribed by the Constitution."

Their record clearly show these jurists are principled and Godly men and women who deserve to their coronations, but Dobson's comment just as clearly demonstrates that this man and his so-called ministry are in thrall to the forces of Satan. Only one practicing the jurisprudence of an atheistic jackanape would interpret 'advise and consent' as allowing the Senate to reject one of our Leader's nominations by a mere majority. The 'and' in the phrase is clearly the additive manditory, not the discretionary optional. The Senate must advise and then must consent, no matter what the vote count might be. It could be 100-0 against the nominee and the Senate would still be constitutionally mandated to consent. The plain meaning of the Framers of the Constitution, seen in the proper Biblical context, could not be clearer.

True, Dobson does call for ending filibusters, but his is only a trojan horse position designed to make real Conservatives settle for less than total domination of the Executive over the Congress (or as I like to call it the Lord over his Choir) as the Constitution clearly demands. The true Christian soul will not be turned aside by Dobson's utter pettifoggery and ill-concealed faggotry. I mean, seriously, who would name their ministry Focus on the Family if they weren't so far in the closet they think they are lost at the haberdasher's? I think that fellow Freud called it over-compensation.

I've got to go oil my meaty glutes now; my barber is paying me a house-call.

A Judgment Upon Israel

The Israeli Supreme Court, save for one brave member who should be held inviolate for his mighty jurisprudence in service to the Lord, today condemned themselves to irrelevance, and righteous retaliation by the Faithful, by ruling that Gaza, Judea, and Samaria are not part of Israel and thus the Israeli government may order Gazite settlers to remove themselves without violating any 'human rights'. The Devil has once again worked his will through the persons of unholy Justices sitting in secular judgement of holy matters. A proper Sanhedrin would have never reached such a witless and Godless decision.

The sages say, "Whosoever rises up against Israel is as though he against the Holy One, blessed be He." Rise up against God these secularist judges of Israel certainly have. They have sundered the nation of Israel in contradiction of His holy word. My jurisprudential thews are throbbing at the thought of this betrayal. The only laws the Jews have ever needed in their long exile and glorious return are the Torah and the Talmud. And the Torah is absolutely unequivocal as to the God given extent of Holy Israel. In Genesis 15:18 God gives the Jewish people the whole extent of the land from the Nile to the Euphrates. What God has graciously given His people cannot be cravenly disposed of by the hand of some prideful secularist judge, who has never even experienced communion with His blessed manfulness.

Needless to say, the Rapture cannot come to take home God's people unless the Jews first restore God's promised land and the Temple. I won't stand for a blockage of my Rapture by judicial fiat! My manly essence is boiling with holy rage! I can clearly understand why the Imams of misguided Islam invented the Fatwa. How useful it would be to declare open season on Godless, gutless judges, by all of the faithful. I would never presume to do such a thing, it would be illegal and immoral: I am definitely not ordering nor condoning nor threatening violence against anyone. That would be wrong. Remember my blessed ones, a proper execution under His Law is only by stoning, burning, decapitation, or strangulation. You wouldn't want to get aslant of the Law while enforcing it. But of course, no body is enforcing anything, now are they?

Now, I have to go wrestle my pack of Great Danes to work off some of my Lordly legal energy.